lenten grace...tuesdays with anna

not to be confused with "tuesdays with morrie."  nobody's on their deathbed here, thank goodness!  who is this anna, you might be wondering?  i don't quite know how to describe her, other than that i very much believe that it is no coincidence that our worlds collided back in september when she started grad school here in boston and began supervising student teachers with me every tuesday.  we made a major connection the first time we met, when we realized that her uncle john was my parish priest growing up in north carolina!  what are the odds?  i mean, really?

anna has taught me a lot since september.  she has helped expand my vision of what makes a good teacher.  she has pushed my boundaries of understanding what it means to live a just life.  she has taught me a LOT about baking.  she has taught me about being vulnerable and sharing faith and life.  she has taught me about sacrifice and the challenges and joys that accompany the first year of marriage (she got married last july).  most of all, her friendship has been an ignition of grace in my life.  i can't tell you how blessed i feel to have had her walk in at the exact time when i was mourning the loss of the community i had lived in for the last three years.  she is like a kindred spirit, and i can't believe we've spent twenty-some years of our lives not knowing each other.

when this semester began, we learned that we would no longer be working together on tuesdays.  however, we both ended up having tuesdays free in our schedules (another gift of grace from God!) and decided to continue to spend time together every tuesday.  this new tradition has encompassed coffee dates, pancake making, bread baking, thai lunches...all of these things always threaded together with rich, life-giving conversation.  during lent, we decided that we would add daily mass to our agenda for tuesdays, which we began this past week.  what a joy to share a new kind of bread- life-giving bread- and a sign of peace- amidst God's grace and love present in the liturgy.  

thank you, God, for the gift of grace in friends and the time to share with them.  thank you for tuesdays.  thank you for anna.

grace in ashes

yesterday was ash wednesday.  this day always comes with mixed feelings for me each year.  i remember as a kid, we would always go to mass as a school, and receive ashes on our forehead.  i would be mortified if we had to go anywhere after school because i didn't like the idea of standing out and looking so different- marked.  as i got into high school and then college, i think i began to see it much more as a part of my identity- this is who i am, and i'm proud of it.  i loved when people would ask me about it, so that i could explain to them why we did it.  of course, the down side is that it means lent is officially here and it's time to make some sacrifices.  nobody likes making sacrifices, and for the longest time, i didn't really see the point.  i got that i had to do it because everyone else was and the church said i had to, but that was about it.  it hasn't been until the past few years that i've really been able to understand the symbolism of the ashes.  we rise again from ashes.  ashes to ashes, dust to dust.  we came from dust, and to dust we shall return.  the ashes are an outward sign of our inner sinfulness and our mortality.  no, we don't particularly want to be reminded of either of those, but sometimes we need to be.  so often we focus on our differences, which is a dangerous slope that can easily lead to thoughts of superiority, prejudice, and all those -isms that nobody likes to talk about.  ashes remind us that we all came from the same place and we are all eventually going to die.  shouldn't that be enough to push us to live our lives peacefully together in between?  if not our lives, at least the forty days of lent?  perhaps within the ashes lies the grace we need to not just endure lent, but actually bring our whole selves to it and take something deep and profound away from it, and then rise to new life with Jesus on Easter Sunday. 

grace in scripture

i always try hard to listen to God's word at church and to try to find within it a message for me.  however, i love the weeks when i don't even have to try: it's just right there in my face, refusing to be ignored!  today's readings, for example...

Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, "Whom shall I send? Who will go for us?" "Here I am," I said; "send me!"
-Isaiah 6:8

"But by the grace of God I am what I am, and his grace to me has not been ineffective."
-1 Corinthians 15:10

Jesus said to Simon, "Do not be afraid; from now on you will be catching men." When they brought their boats to the shore, they left everything and followed him.
-Luke 5: 10-11


i'm in the midst of a job search.  i've spent the last two years working toward a degree so that i am qualified to serve in the ministry to which i feel called.  now it's time to find the place that is the best fit: where their needs match up with my gifts.  it's a tough time.  it's a time of uncertainty, of questioning, and of faith.  i have to believe that God has given me grace i don't deserve and called me by name to serve his people.  i will not be afraid.  i will follow.