grace in the ebbs and flows of friendship

“ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation.”

-the prophet by kahlil gibran

i don't often do tributes to individuals on this blog, but when i started it, i set its purpose as a place for me to write about my experiences with grace, and God, and there is no way for me to talk about these things without describing the people who bring grace into my life and who have brought me closer to God.  one particular person has greatly influenced my life over the past six years, and tonight i had to say goodbye because she is moving far away.  you may think i am being silly and dramatic because in this world of texting and email and blogs and facebook, no one is ever really far away.  well, all i have to say to that is that quality time must not be your love language.

i hadn't actually thought about the moment of saying goodbye when i agreed to share one last meal.  in fact, i hate goodbyes.  but at the same time, they are a form of ritual and i do see the value in ritual.  there were many moments throughout the meal when glimpses of times we've shared and conversations we've had popped into my mind, and i sent up a little prayer of gratitude each time.  then all of a sudden, it was time.  the kids were in the car, and i got that feeling behind my eyes and in my chest and knew that i couldn't stop the tears from coming.  i am so blessed to have someone in my life that it is so hard to say goodbye to.

"the way we are seen and understood by others is different from the way we see and understand ourselves. we will never fully know the significance of our presence in the lives of our friends. that's a grace, a grace that calls us not only to humility, but to a deep trust in those who love us."

-henri nouwen

karen, you will never fully know the significance of your presence in my life.  your willingness to walk with me on my journey and to allow me to walk with you on yours has meant more to me than words can say.  you have been a mirror to me, when i needed my own goodness and light reflected back toward me because i couldn't see it on my own.  you have brought me closer to God by sharing God's grace.  you have been a rare friend - the kind that don't come along everyday - the kind that i thank God for, always.  

i wish you the very best in this next chapter, which i know will hold many adventures and opportunities.  know that i am cheering for you and praying for you every step of the way, from a distance.

"don't be dismayed by good-byes. a farewell is necessary before you can meet again. and meeting again, after moments or lifetimes, is certain for those who are friends."

~Illusions:  The Adventures of a Reluctant Messiah by Richard Bach